When was the last time you stopped to consider how many times during the course of a day you may be wrong about something?
Put another way: How natural is it for you to make an assumption about something or someone? I know that, for me, it can happen in a micro-moment; a nano-instant. I’ve recognized it and have been training myself not to keep walking into that trap, but it’s easy to do.
Your assumption could be about what you think your spouse or partner is thinking or feeling, or maybe the reason why a friend has not yet returned your text quite yet. Perhaps it’s the mental gymnastics we do in considering the motivation behind that snarky email you got at work, or maybe you saw somebody walking down the street and instantly assumed that you knew more about them that you actually do.
How Many Of Your Opinions & Actions Are Based On Assumption?
Examining that notion honestly, what percentage of the dozens of guesses and judgments you make about people and things every single day do you feel are correct? Even if it’s high – say, 70 or 75% (which I think is a ridiculous number to aspire to but let’s use it for the sake of this conversation) – that means that you’re still wrong a quarter of the time, carrying around thoughts in your mind and the feelings and emotions that go with them about something that is fundamentally inaccurate. Can you see how that would twist and skew your own experience?
Consider that for a moment. Just pause and think about the implications of working and living and breathing, day after day, in a sea of thoughts and feelings based in large part upon opinions and assumptions that aren’t true.
Here is just one example of a time that I know I got it wrong. Watch and see if you can relate, and subscribe and share if it’s at all familiar to you.
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This is one of the key elements in the book “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz: Don’t make assumptions. It is hard not to do. It begins with awareness. Eventually you will find that what others are doing is not about us, it is about them. Conversely, what we think and assume about others doesn’t tell us so much about them as it does describe ourselves.
If you’ve got a story about how assuming has slowed you down in your life, what you did about it and/or what you do to keep yourself from falling into that same trap now, leave your thoughts in the comments section, below.
And if you’d like to come along on this creative journey and learn and grow together, join me via email. I’d love your company!