Podcast interview on learning to love yourself with Katie Kozlowski
Katie Kozlowksi is a spiritual teacher, self realization coach and healer. I was immediately intrigued to talk with Katie when I saw the phrase “Learning to Love Yourself” associated with her website, and the idea of her inviting people to be a part of the “Loving to be Me” Collective.
Self love is something I didn’t discover – or even recognize or consider as an option – until I was in my late 30’s. I’ve since found that this is not uncommon and that, in fact, I caught on to it fairly early relative to most.
This has got to change.
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Katie’s is a powerful story about how so many of us start out so happy and free, how it easy it is to get lost, and the consequences of the unconscious cruelty we inflict on ourselves and others when we’re not in touch with who we really are. And most of us aren’t.
I won’t tell much more of Katie’s story here, because she covers it so well in the conversation you’ll hear if you listen to the episode. But it’s an important lesson and I hope that you’ll listen carefully, and I also hope that, if you have a young woman in your life, that you will share this with them. Young men need to hear this too. Maybe even more so. In fact – just my opinion – we all can do better with understanding what it means to love yourself, and to understand and embrace that others are experiencing their own challenge with the same issue.
Isn’t is a shame that you come here to enjoy your life and you spend the whole time wishing you were someone else because they have things you want.
– Katie Kozlowski
A few key things I took from my time with Katie:
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You Are Not Your Body – She talks about the difference between your soul and your body, and how her accident (which she describes) jolted her soul and her body back together. It’s a powerful observation
- Happy Can Look Messy – Listen for how she describes herself as a kid. As we get older, we start putting all sorts of conditions on what it takes to be happy. But happy can be simple, and even messy. The reverse is also true: so many of us put up appearances and seem to look as if we have everything all tidy and put together when, in fact, we’re actually falling apart inside.
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The Irony of “Playful Transformation” (because it brings you back to the real you) – Listen for why Katie jokes that she “peaked” in Grade 3. She already knew who she was. She just needed to find her again, or “transform” back to who she already used to be (and still was). I believe the same is true for most of us.
In this culture, we don’t know how to love ourselves unconditionally unless it’s from a narcissistic level. We don’t know what it is.
– Katie Kozlowski
Here is the conversation with Katie Kozlowski on The No Schedule Man Podcast:
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The founder of No Schedule Man Brand Media, Kevin Bulmer is a Strategic Marketing and Mindset Coach and Keynote Speaker. He is the producer and host of the momondays London inspirational event series, strategic marketing coach for Awesomepreneurs and is also host of the podcast, “Journeys with the No Schedule Man.”
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I think if more people realise how simply it is to love themselves they might start enjoying life the way its intended! I think this is a great site and also good for people who are still on their journey to discovering self love and personal happiness, for me its still a journey but like you only started to really appreciate it when I got to my 30’s and its still in process but i’m enjoying the discovery and I love your page and will recommend it to friends and family!.
Etaya.
Hi Etaya,
Thank you for your very kind words and encouragement. I’d love to have you and your family & friends stop by anytime. We’re all on the journey. I don’t believe that ever stops. Anyone who says they’re “there” has stopped growing.
I’m glad you’re enjoying the discovery!
Best wishes,
Kevin
Hi Etaya! Thank you so much for this awesome response. You are so right– love is so simple that we make it hard to find it sometimes. I wonder why that its… Luckily people like you are ready to explore this with me and I am so grateful for that! Come visit me at my site anytime and yes please share this podcast with the world. Kevin is doing amazing work!
Learning to love ones self may be empowering, especially if you were beaten down as a child. We believe what the adults in our lives tell us. We then internalize and begin to believe it. We become victims of our own thoughts of ourselves. I went a different route. I started reading the bible and believing in how God sees me. I slowly got rid of negative thoughts about my self and the truth of who God made me to be.
Ultimately the positive outweighs the negative. For one negative in your life replace it with two or three positives about your self and get rid of nasties(thoughts).
Those are some great ideas, Linda. Thank you.
Thank you for visiting and leaving those remarks. I’m grateful!
Best wishes,
Kevin
Hi MarieAnne~ Yes you are so right. God is a beautiful way to see our own value and love- because God’s eyes are the mirrors of our souls. Beautiful path indeed! Come visit me at my site anytime and keep hanging out here! Love x3, Katie
Awesome post. Thankyou!
I completely agree with the ‘happy can look messy’ part.
Kevin
Thanks Kevin. I appreciate the comments.
Best wishes,
Kevin
Hi Kevin! Yes I am with you 100%. I think happiness is messy indeed- like a baby splashing in the mud or eating spaghetti for the first time. In-joy~ Katie
Wonderful post! So many are lost within when they are chasing other things like money and fame. Healthy doesn’t just mean that we are physically healthy, the inner peace and happiness is just as important!
Completely agree with you, Olivia. Thanks for stopping by and chiming in!
Best wishes,
Kevin
Hi Olivia! Yes yes yes~ as the wise ones say… Inner peace and happiness are essential! Im so happy you agree. Come visit me in my world anytime and keep listening to these podcasts! Love x3- Katie
What a great topic you have here! We all need self love and love who we are. It’s hard to know how to do that and I sure didn’t know how to do this until recently as well. It’s so easy to get lost and confused of who are you. I’m still not sure what my real purpose is here but learning to love who I currently know I am, would be the first step in figuring that out I think.
Happiness is definitely within us, and we just have to dive within and enjoy it.
Thanks, Grace. I appreciate your kind words and observations.
Thanks for visiting!
All the best,
Kevin
Grace- what a beautiful name! Yes isn’t it funny that we have a hard time finding what’s under our noses the entire time… Looking withIN…. who would have thought! Thank you so much and please come visit me anytime in my cyberspace love land. And keep hanging out here! Love x3, Katie
We definitely need to love ourselves, no one else is going to fill that need because no one else is in the same position to know ourselves the same way! It’s sad how hard it is to do something that should be so easy. I appreciate good stories like Katie’s where something dramatic happens to manually push the re-set button, and place you on the path of love and forgiveness and compassion. thanks for sharing!
Hi Penny,
Thanks for that. I agree completely that it’s sad, how hard it can be.
I appreciate your time & kind comments. Thanks!
Best wishes,
Kevin
Penny! Thank you so much. I am grateful you enjoyed it. I agree— why is is it so hard to do the easiest things like loving yourself and surrendering to your heart? We are gonna figure it out together! Come visit me anytime at loving to be me and I am so happy you loved the story. And keep supporting No Schedule Man! With love, Katie
Hi Kevin,
Fascinating interview. Loved it. Love Katie’s voice and she has some great stories. The thought of fantasising about being dead and wondering if people would miss you. I really think that is the law of attraction. ‘Would anybody care if I died?’ Really deep stuff and her story of self love is amazing. Great podcast!
Thanks for all you do Kevin 🙂
Love it.
Kev
Thanks Kev! I appreciate your encouragement and kind words. You’re doing great work, too. Keep it up!
Best wishes,
Kevin
Hi Kevin! Thank you so much. You said it my friend– the LOA works many ways right? Be careful what you wish for because you might get it. In my case it was a blessing, but why not love ourselves before that miracle has to intervene right? I am grateful you enjoyed it and please come visit me over at loving to be me anytime. And I agree- Kevin’s podcast is fabulous. Thank you for listening in. Love x3 Katie
I have a tendency to be very hard on myself as I feel it drives me to better myself. But there still has to be time for love too. To acknowledge the successes and bask in your glories. After all, if will you ever do is drive yourself for success but never enjoy or acknowledge it …what it the point in that success?
I hear you, Steve. You can drive yourself and love yourself at the same time. I found that out the hard way. The key is, are you driving yourself to achieve something so that you can THEN feel good? Or are you simply enjoying the drive because you’ve embraced who you are and are enjoying each moment fully? There’s a big difference between the two. The first one, I found out, leads to breakdown. The second one is a thrill-a-minute joy ride!
Thanks for popping in!
Best wishes,
Kevin
Hi Steve~ thank you for sharing this insight. Yes balance is key and a wonderful thing. But it’s true if we find that we are pushing ourselves without the loving kindness piece too, it can begin to feel like pressure and emotionally like bullying. The best way to incorporate both is to become the kind of coach you always wish you had– encouraging and supportive while also being firm and honest. There’s plenty of room for celebration and success without bullying yourself. I have no doubt you’re doing a great job and if you extra tools come visit me at my website anytime. Thank you for listening In! With love, Katie
Hi Kevin,
I think I can relate to point 2 concerning happy can look messy, when you say about the reverse.
I am nice to people, even though sometimes something is not right with me or something is on my mind. I think I do this for a few reasons, although it does depend on the level of my problem.
If I do have a small problem then I will be my usual happy cheerful self when I greet and talk to people. If it is a bigger problem then I might be a bit quiet, or even tell my problems if I am close to that person.
So in that respect I suppose it is who I am confronted with will determine how I project myself.
Hey Owain,
Yeah, the second thing you described – saying how you actually feel – is being authentic. Not that we want to go around dumping on other people all the time, of course, but our society is sick with telling the world – and ourselves – that we’re “fine” when we’re not. That becomes a slippery slope …
Appreciate your comments, as always!
Best wishes,
Kevin
HI Owain! Yes you are talking about the reflection in some ways– the way you treat yourself is how you treat others and also the way you see others is somehow reflecting the way you see yourself.
So choosing to be kind and happy is a wonderful thing when it’s really how you feel and then on the days when you feel otherwise, it is safe to not be bubbling over with joy and exuberance, but it is also wise to not project your anger or sadness onto others.
It sounds like you are doing an excellent job and know very well who you are. You’re welcome to come visit Loving To Be Me anytime and I am so grateful you enjoyed the podcast and listen IN to it often! Love Katie
I am completely comfortable with self love and for the last ten years I thought I loved myself. This year, as I celebrate 50 years in this life experience, I realize I was basing my self love on conditions outside myself. My love for myself has been conditional although I have told myself and the world I practice unconditional love. As Spring unfolds, so does a new approach to my self love. Thank you Kevin and Katie for loving your public and yourselves enough to gift the world with this podcast. I look forward to sharing my story with Kevin in the near future.
Hi Tonya,
Thank you very much for your very kind words. Your description of your process of discovering self love sounds very similar to mine.
I wish you peace of mind and heart and all the health and happiness that you desire.
Best wishes,
Kevin
Hi Tonya! Yes yes yes! It’s amazing how often what we THINK is love is really not authentic because it’s based on the outside… but you have all the tools to get withIN and I am so happy to have connected with you. Keep up the amazing work! Love, Katie